Been out the whole day today, surprised my mum by buying her a necklace form SK. HAHA. But lunch was fun, she taught me a lot about life again. Felt so good after talking it all out with her. She also shared with me about herself, having all the health problems, which I’m seriously worried. But like what she say, take a step at a time. Shall listen to her then. Watch movie afterwards and it was freaking funny.

Then after that went to Shirley’s birthday party, it has been so long since I’ve saw her, and kind of miss going out with her, shall meet her sometime soon. I was freaking late though, eveyone left except Yong Shen, another person that I have not seen for a long time.

Yesterday was a branch lunch, almost everyone did turn up, and I’m so satisfied. =]] Thanks everyone for the day!! Greatly appreciated. =] I’m gonna leave the branch soon, and it’s time for me to move on. Shan’t blah so much this time, cause I’m really tired.

Ok, my mind is in a blank now, shall sop here for now. Ciaos

For all that has happened, I’m really sorry for what happened. To: Min

Tomorrow will be my first and last time going out together with my colleagues together as colleagues. I’m kind of excited, but kind of dreading it as time for me to leave UOB is near. Jocelyn is right, she feels that I will cry on the last day of work, which I think I would. Time flies really fast, I’ve been with the bank for almost a year, with UOB JE for more than half a year, just as we are beginning to bond, I have to leave for my future, for my good. Auntie Jenny is right, I cannot be a part timer forever, I need to move on and I REALLY NEED A FULL TIME JOB.

Interviewing OCBC was just a moment of folly, I never thought that I would ever get in. But I did in the end, and I contented. Maybe my kite will fly higher over there, and who knows? I may even join back UOB 2 years later. *winks*
I love the people over at JE, I feel so warmth around them, and there will always be people around me to help me when I’m in need. All the overrides, cash requests and verification, if not for the excellent teamwork, will not be so smooth. I thank all my mentors in UOB, even in UOB Holland. Grace, Carmen and Yin Lan.

I want to thank Sock Cheng, Mabel, Auntie Jenny, Angie, Dorothy, Diana,  Jean, Daniel, Elvy, Christina, Intan, Sandee, Hwai Meen and Gina for all their help. Without them, I wouldn’t be who I am now. THANK YOU AND I LOVE YOU PEOPLE!! UOB has been the best workplace I have ever worked so far. And I will never for get the people there.

I saved this best part for my blondies, Min Hui and Jocelyn!!! I love the times we were together, have fun inside and outside of work. Without you girls around, I wouldn’t have enjoyed working so much, waiting to see you gusy everyday. YOU ALL MUST MUST MUST STAY IN CONTACT WITH ME OK? IF NOT I WILL BURN DOWN UOB JE!!! HAHAHAHA, AND PLEASE LEAVE A C OMMENT WHEN YOU READ THIS PART!! =]]

No matter what, I shall enjoy myself and have fun with all of them tomorrow!!! MUACKS!!! =]]

Using mahjong to cure all my pains has all along been my thinking, but it doesn’t seem to work this time. Played mahjong with the old gang yesterday, hoping that it would change my mood a lil’, but it doesn’t seems to be the case at all. After playing, I’m back to myself again. Tried committing suicide yesterday, but it didn’t work, was stopped by my brother, think i really scared him yesterday. I really didn’t mean it, but I just can’t stop thinking of what had happened.

I don’t wanna live till 30 anymore, I just wanna live happily. Every 4 months I need to prepare myself for a good medical report, so that I can live for another 4 months. I need to be on medication everyday so that I can survive, it’s so stupid that my life is controlled by my sickness. I have a broken family that I never thought that I would have. Sometimes when I dream, I will dream of my childhood, where everyone in my family would be there to celebrate for me, but whenever I wake up from my dream, I need to wipe off my tears and tell myself, just bloody hell come back to the reality and move on with my life. I always dote on the wrong person, take for example, my younger brother, he just makes me feel like killing myself every time I quarrel with him. Why can’t he just understand how I feel how much I care for him and appreciate what me and mum did for him?

I ever first job stepping into the society, UOB, waited for them to converted me for 1 FREAKING YEAR, in the end, I was threatened that I might not be able to renew my contract. I wasted one year of opportunities outside. I feel so stupid, why would I have even trusted that they will convert me in the first place?

I used to be bullied by even my bestest friends, so it has already created a barrier in my life, telling me that friends cannot be trusted. So whatever friends that I have now, I scared, what if one day the same thing happens to me once again? Then I would fail this also. Jorge was right, birthday celebrations will be the time where I hand in my score cards, to see how well I score. This is one of the reason why I refused to celebrate for this year. I’ve seen failed marriages, and even the most unexpected couple would have broken up because of one petite thing. Why should I even trust relationships and get into one after seeing all this shit?

My life is full of crap. FUCK LIFE.

P.S: This is not an emo post, if you wanna comment anything regarding about me being emo, FUCK YOU in advance

Another end of the week, another accomplished weekend, just hoping that I will be able to do whatever I can now before something happens to me.

Going for checkup soon, wonder what the doctor will say about me this time round. Hopefully everything is fine.

Celebrated Jorge’s Birthday and everything came off smoothly, so happy that I did another surprise party successfully again, and it’s Jorge’s, so you can expect it to be more tedious than the rest that I have done before, he is hard to trick!! Making him to train with me all the way to AMK and coming back from there is a hard to do task liao.. AND OH MY GOD, I DID IT!! LOL
But of course without the help of Minhui, Brandon and Jocelyn (Seow), it wouldn’t be so successful either. THANKS PEEPS FOR HELPING!! =]]

No photos were taken this time round, only memories, which I think is good enough for Jorge to stay happy till next year, where 21st is really the more important one. Maybe I should open an event company just for surprises, HAHA.

I told Jorge that I didn’t wanna celebrate my birthday this year, simply because I really don’t feel a need to do so. My life doesn’t involve a lot of people, and I hate attending parties if you must know, so why should I have on when I hate one? All my ideas dropped off after finding out that I have already celebrated many times of birthday liao. My mum is right, how come 21 is important when all the year in my life, I can only have it once? It’s just the point that I’m turning into an adult, that makes it “looks” more important, come to think of it, really nothing much ah. right?

So people, I’m seriously not celebrating birthday this year, tired to host anything, or even to plan anything. I wanna rest. =]]

Got news from mabel that most probably I won’t be able to renew my contract this time round, well, kind of expected it, since i’m like working in UOB. Somehow, I felt kind of relieved that I need not worry about converting to full time anymore, but I will be really hard for me to say goodbye to my nicest colleagues, they’re more than that, so precious that I may even cry on my last day of work. They are the only “thing” that keeps me going at work. OH GOSH. I don’t wanna think liao. Anyways, I’ve already send in my resume to OCBC, shall see how it goes.

So scary. next month onwards, I will be alone, Jorge go NS liao, I’m no more at UOB. OH FUCK, I should start getting used to this real soon.

Next week’s itenary should be quite relax, it’s a long weekend though, so should I plan something for myself? Hahas, maybe I should right? Btw, next week we’re only going to 2AM Dessert Bar and tentativly River Bungee. Still thinking of what can I do now for next week, it’s my mum’s birthday though, but i will be pushing it to the next week instead, because my pay haven come in yet, and I’ve already overspent for this month. GRRRRR

OK, until here for now, back soon.

There’s so many things going on lately, that I duno where to start updating, balme me for not updating on-going-ly, but i just dun have the habit, hahas. Actually, I’ve been out with the blondes recently, so any updates would just be about the blondes. And we really have a lot going on, so it would be rather boring also.

Jorge was like telling me to update, so i decided to update now!! Hmm, few things i would like to talk about.
I’m really irritated by indecisive people, and I would really flare up if all these nonsense goes on, it really leaves me super indecisive that what i should do next.
I’m sick of giving up something that I should have, just for the sake of another person, and I should really stop doing that, since it’s not worth the price.
I’m tired of the family issues that I have, and I would really rather give my family up just to let me leave in peace for my last 10 years

Life’s so tiring, I need to plan and plan and plan. And what do i get in the end? Never ending complains and never ending blames. I don’t even wanna celebrate my 21st, it’s pointless, plan just for that very day, in the end, that very 4 hours would end everything, so wasteful. Why should I even celebrate my pathetic life?

Nothing to blame, no one to blame, I’m just blaming myself for having to go through all these SHIT. FUCK, I HATE MY LIFE

Anyone to play me? I’m all in. =]

OMG, I JUST REALISED THAT I HAVE NOT POSTED OUT THIS ENTRY!!! SORRY GUYS!! =]]

I’m getting freaking broke these days, like really damn broke, because my one week of MC’s claims have been postponed to next month, i get one week lesser pay!!! That’s right! =]

I got back to work just yesterday, after my one week of block leave, and another week of block MC (Courtesy from TTSH).
I was so delighted to see all my colleagues when I returned to work, we screamed at the moment when we saw each other. HAHA!! Such a mad branch. But when I returned, I realised lots of rules are implemented, but oh wells, just have to get used to them.

Oh, back to the real topic, I’m having a garage sale!!! Feel free to drop by on the 18th July, I really need the money, do come and support!!
Items that would be put up for sale:
So old dusty bears, but they are still cute!!
Some old clothes
Some old bags
Some old magazines
Some old CDs
OHH, LAST OF ALL………………….

…..

…..

…..

…..

SOME OLD TOWELS!!

THAT’S RIGHT!!
THANKS!! (BARBERELLA STYLE)

Oh, and I’m addicted to poker nowadays, =]]

Scene at Koufu At Yew Tee Point

Name of the stalls:
Delicious Chicken (Chicken Rice Stall)
Fresh Fish (Fish Porridge & Fish Noodles)

Comments by Jorge: “HOW CONVINCING!!”

LMAO

I’m in a mess now, I don’t know what I still have for you